So I sat down to type up some answers to a few interview questions I was sent, and of course for me the most dreaded part of answering interview questions is including photos to go along with the feature. I don’t know why but I just don’t enjoy that part so much though I know it is a necessary evil to make the story more complete. So I opened up my iPhoto app to take a look and see which photos would make the cut and I went back to the beginning of my Hair Journey album. To say I was shocked was an understatement. My hair journey isn’t as long as many of the other amazing ladies out here sharing their stories. I’ve been relaxer free for a little over two years now, and transitioned for 11 months before doing my own big chop from the comfort of my bathroom. Fast forward a year later I’m here with you sharing hair tips, tricks, and growth challenges to get maximum growth in minimal time. I’ve shared the good and bad of biotin, the inversion method…etc. But I failed to share the key ingredient to growing your natural hair long and healthy because I myself forgot about it as well. As corny as it is going to sound the key ingredient to growing your natural hair long is: PATIENCE!

I took a look at my photos from the first few months after my big chop and its amazing to see how far I’ve come and almost laughable at how frustrated I get with my hair, or the speed that it is growing/not growing in my own mind. I say its laughable because the difficulties I had during my transition period were way worse than any hair issues I am currently facing now. I’ve tackled the difficult part of the journey and I am now adjusting to a regimen I have securely set up that for the most part works for me. So why am I so frustrated and truing to rush through every moment of this journey? In just 15 months I have made tremendous strides in leaps and bounds even though I have had minor set backs such as necessary evil trims at the worst possible times, and nape breakage ( which I am still currently battling now) I’ve gone through the product junkie stage, the perfect curl stage, the ugly duckling stage, and the almost giving up stage. And now here I am at the middle stage unhappy with the tremendous growth I’ve had, because I’m looking to my hair crushes as inspiration instead of being proud of what it is that I have on my head.

Before this gets long winded and preachy I just wanted to take the time out to say ladies your hair is growing and it is growing at its own pace. There is nothing you can do to speed up the process, or skip any stages of the journey you are supposed to take. My goal now isn’t to rush through each stage but to thoroughly appreciate each of them while maintaining a healthy hair regimen that will produce healthy hair. I’ll focus more on length retention rather than being obsessed with length gaining. From the photos I found hidden in the deep archives, when I had the most fun is when I saw the best results. With the added stressors in life, your hair should not be one of them. But most importantly I will be patient with the process. Ladies put down the tape measurers (at least for now), the hair pills, and the miracle products. Nothing is going to make your hair grow faster than it is supposed to. Length checks are great and can be a source of motivation, but shouldn’t be done in every waking moment. I’ve come to realize that it is a genetic disposition that causes different results and you can’t fight your hair, it is a losing battle. So instead enjoy your hair, learn your hair, have fun, experiment , and be creative. That is when you will see the results! It’s just a matter of time and patience!

Hey there! I’m Melissa, co-founder of Trials n Tresses, natural hair and beauty lover, binge tv watcher and lover of life. When I am not creating content for TNT, I’m busy teaching the future of society.